Fightin' Mad
If it's a part of the game, why isn't it a part of every game?
Copyright Iain Fyffe, 2002

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I’d like to take a look at hockey’s goons.  I’ll preface this article by saying that fighting in hockey is nothing to glorify.  I believe anyone fighting in a game should be given a game misconduct, with three of those equaling a suspension.  I detest the fact that no-talent “pugilists” take away jobs from talented hockey players.  Hockey is worse for fighting.

I’m going to use data from 2000/01, and look at all players who had 10 or more fighting majors that year.  I’ve subjectively broken these players into three categories.  Tough Guys are good players who happen to have fighting as a part of their games.  If fighting were to be banned, they would not fear for their jobs, they just wouldn’t fight anymore.  Policemen have some talent, but are often called upon to undertake the ritualized, meaningless fights that pervade the NHL.  If fighting were to be banned, they would have to fight for their jobs, but by using their skill.  Knuckle-Draggers are those useless goons who can often barely skate, and exist only to participate in “brouhahas”.  If fighting were to be banned, these players would have to find another line of work.

Below are the three categories for the 2000/01 season, with data on their position (Pos), number of fighting majors (Ft), games played (GP), and average time on ice (TOI).

Tough Guys

Policemen

Knuckle-Draggers 

Notice that while most of the Tough Guys are defencemen, almost none of the Policemen and Knuckle-Draggers are.  This is because defencemen are too valuable a position to waste on a guy who’s going to play less than 10 minutes a game, and spend an equal amount in the penalty box.  It’s easier to spread the minutes among 11 other forwards than it is 5 other defencemen.  Notice also that not a single centre is listed.  Why?  Because the centre position is reserved for the really good players. 

Now here’s a nice table.  It shows the proportion of regular-season games played by each category (RS%), and the proportion of playoff games played (PL%, counting only those teams that made the playoffs, of course):

Now here’s a conundrum.  Generally, the people who say things like “fighting is a part of the game” will also say that “playoff hockey is real hockey”.  If fighting is a part of the game, why do Knuckle-Draggers (the guys who are paid only to fight) lose two-thirds of their playing time in the playoffs?  When it really counts, the Knuckle-Draggers are left in the pressbox.

I’ve only one more complaint.  I admit I’m not an expert in most sports, so I can’t be sure that this is true.  But it seems to me that hockey is the only sport where some players are paid specifically to break the rules.  Fighting is illegal; that’s why there’s a penalty given out.  And some players are in the lineup for the specific purpose of fighting, which is against the rules.  Where’s the sportsmanship in that?

The Society for International Hockey Research recently adopted a definition of what hockey is, in order to better investigate the origins of the game.  Nowhere in this definition is fighting mentioned.  Fighting is NOT part of the game.  So the next time you see two simians pounding the snot out of each other for no particular reason, please shake your head in disdain.  That’s not hockey.